A Dot in the Universe...

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are you looking for me? or am i supposed to look for you?

Friday, August 29, 2008

2 months and going stronger!

Wait!!

2 months na ang blog ko!

*****Happy Second Monthsary!!*****

***Confetti***

Sige go, magbasa na ng post!



Advanced happy birthday Z!

Umbrella-ella...

Umbrella Part 1

as the hole got bigger and bigger, my chances of getting in without a key or magic blew up in grandiose proportions... and when a hole enough for my hand and the umbrella to fit, i stopped pulling the screen apart.. i sighed really hard...

"game"

good thing my shirt was black. cause i know for a fact i am gonna get dirty with this. with the cane umbrella at hand, i started my way (or i mean, my hand and the umbrella) through the hole... like a virgin experiencing his first time... i held the umbrella at its end and first inserted the crook handle (thanks wikipedia for the terms!)... good thing the screen didn't moan! (eww!)

"bwisit naman na kurtina to"

"alis dyan alis dyan"

after making my way inside... i stopped... shit... napagod ako dun... and it hurts... the ends of the meshes felt like blunt needes pinching and scratching through your skin! but anyways, for the sake of getting inside, it felt like i had no choice...

remember that the door is actually locked in three ways (see images)... but i am only worried with the door chain and the dead bolt. opening the door knob would just be a breeze... thanks to the MRT cards...







From left to right: door knob, deadbolt and door chain..


my first instinct was not to go fiddle with the locks as soon as i got my hands and my magical umbrella inside. i need to get the lights on first. what if in the middle of me doing my deed, someone grabs my arm and says "anong ginagawa mo?" in a horrifying and ghastly way. that's scary. and you end up one arm lesser. (duh, you're overreacting!)

no. but seriously i was thinking that if i had the lights on, someone upstairs would've noticed it... and will question himself or herself why is it opened or why wasn't it turned off.. and will go down and turn it off for the sake of saving electricity... and will hear someone knocking on the door... and will see me outside like a lost dog wanting to go home... and whalah! my salvation!

if you'd look at the picture to the left, that is how far the window is from the actual door. and you can't actually insert your whole arm inside because of the metal bars blocking the actual window itself. and so i started using the umbrella as my magical hand... i started scouring the wall for the switch...

"asan ka na? shit naman..."

"ayan. sige. diin mo. diin pa." (akala mo naman may milagrong nangyayari!)

boom. let there be light. and there was light. yey! the living room was now lit. thanks to the umbrella. one down. more to go. i stared at the living room and thought, had they heard me knocking and shouting, i wouldn't be doing this stunt. damn. i pulled out my arm and the umbrella - dahil nangangalay na ako. (ano? masarap?) and darn the umbrella was heavy. well for me, it was.

while resting and charging for my next attack. i resorted to my old ways, banging the door. shouting through the window and throwing rocks hoping someone will be pitiful enough to open the door for. but neither the old ways.. nor the bright lights made sense...

coz for me what made sense at that time was me getting inside and lying on my bed and floating away for dreamland...

...to be continued...

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Thankie!

Thank you sa lahat ng nagbabasa, nagbasa at magbabasa ng blog ko.

Felt like I never had the chance to thank you all.

Yun lang.

Feel ko lang magdrama bakit ba.

*MwaHugZ*

-JuLiaN (aka SourcE)

Hagdan

tuwing uuwi kami ng officemate ko from work, lagi kaming sasakay ng mrt. from boni station, ako bababa ng north ave station, sya naman ay sa cubao. lagi nga naming napag-uusapan ung lady guard sa mrt na uber sungit at nakakainis magcheck ng bag. nandun din ang mga taong nakapwesto at nagbebenta ng kung ano ano... kasama ang kanilang asawa ang mga paslit na bata.

kahapon ng umaga, eksaktong pag-akyat namin sa taas. nakita namin ng kasama ko ang isang batang babae. mga 2 taon pa lang. naglalakad. palaboy laboy dun. napansin ng kasama ko na yung bata eh papunta sa hagdan (ung daanan sa pioneer woodlands showroom). dahil ang kasama ko eh, uber bait and concerned. napasigaw sya ng konti at tinawag ung bata.

"uy san ka ba pupunta, wag ka dyan"

hindi tumigil ang bata, patuloy sa paglakad. dahil doon, hinabol ng kasama ko ang bata at pinigilan bago pa ito makarating sa mismong hagdan. pinaharap nya yung bata sa kabilang direksyon. ang bata naman, tumingin sa nanay nyang parang walang pakealam sa kanyang anak. tumakbo ang bata pabalik sa kanyang nanay.

"ano ba nmn yang nanay na yan, anak ng anak, hindi naman maalagaan"

"uu nga, tapos tinatawag lang nya ung anak nya, as if naman pakikinggan nung bata"

"oo nga. aanga-anga ka dyan (i was pertaining to the mom), tapos may nangyari sa anak mo iiyak-iyak ka"

"oo nga..."

(at the back of my mind, mas mahalaga pa ba ang paninda mo kesa sa mga anak mo? kaya ka nga nagttrabaho eh para sa mga anak mo...)

the incident disappeared from our senses that fast, as the thought of the lady guard and her "kasungitan" bothered us...

Monday, August 25, 2008

wall-e

i just came home from trinoma. me and my bestfriend watched wall-e... last full show. sobrang cute and funny.

one thing i noticed was they never played the national anthem anymore. di ba dati pag last full show, they would play the anthem with the video. everybody would stand and just wait til the its done and then the movie will start or if not, more trailers will be shown.


pero kanina wala. andami nang trailers na pinakita, pero wala yun.

ganun na ba yun? sorry, ngayon lang uli ako nakapanood ng movie na last full show. smile!

cute nung mga robots! bibili nga ako nung miniature na robots na yun. ha ha...

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Umbrella

after having bonding sessions with my friends in starbucks, i decided to go home, despite invites from them to go drink til the morning. i strongly said that i would be coming the next time they'd be going out again. i was just tired. it was 2 in the morning.

as i reached home, as i would expect, the door is locked. i didn't bring any key with me. and even if i had it, it will still be useless. see the door is locked in three ways... (a door chain, the regular door knob and a deadbolt). so even if you open the door knob, using a key, or perhaps an MRT/LRT card, which i can always do, opening the door completely would still be unsuccessful...

and just when i had thought that i was unlucky - i realized i was more unluckier. my cellphone went empty batt! normally, before knocking the door, i would either send my mom a message, or perhaps call the phone, just to wake her up. it appears that i'll be doing more than what knocking sounds...

at first i was calm. knocking gently. hoping that they'd hear it. knocked. knocked again. then i shouted through the windows. still no go.

minutes passed. my knocking went a little louder and stronger. then there's the occassional name calling. i brought out my wallet, got an expired MRT ticket and tried opening the door knob even though i knew that it's still not enough to get me in.

more minutes passed. louder knocks. stronger shouts. 30 minutes. still no answer. what made it hard is that their room is closed. aircon was on which overpowers my voice. so i decided to do my next move. rock throwing. i picked up little rocks. and threw them to their room. one. two. three. trying to make stones pass through the porch and luckily hit either the door or window or basically anything that would make noise.

argh. the sounds it make are so faint it can't be heard either. nah. back to knocking. and shouting. then i found a cane umbrella on one side. i used it to knock - to make the sounds louder and eventually wake my mom up. still no avail.

shit. 45 minutes. im sweating. my shirts wet. my hanky's wet as well. i took a break. sat down. listened to my ipod. and did the occassional knocking or should i say banging, shouting and stone throwing.

an hour has passed. feels like i've been thrown out of the house. feels like forever out here. with sweat still dripping from my head to my body, i kinda thought of something. the window screen. i have the umbrella, i can definitely use this.

so irregardless of the idea that i'll be leaving a big hole on the screen covered window, i had no hesitations and started doing it. time to get down and dirty. with my bare hands i started pulling the screen on one corner of the window. slowly the big meshed screen started popping out of the edges. one down. one more. the i started pulling out the other, the one with smaller meshes.

....to be continued...

Locked

umuwi ka na ba sa bahay isang gabi na walang susi? ano ginawa mo?

post to follow in a coupla hours...

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Blog Tag

Hay. I noticed this na sa post ni Eugene, di ko binasa yung dulo. Tapos nakita ko sa blog ni Erin.. he was tagged by Eugene. Hala. Balik ako sa blog ni Eugene, was tagged too! Nyahaha. Anyways, gawin ko na rin..

1. When was your first kiss and where?
Sa isang sinehan sa Robinson's Ermita (yung old Rob Ermita pa.)

2. When was your first real relationship and how long did it last?
3 years ago. Basta.

3. What age were you allowed to date?
Meron bang ganyan?

4. What's the craziest thing you did (for love) when you were a teenager?
Wasnt a teenager when I was in love. I was 21 or 20 I think.

5. How long is your longest relationship and what's the secret?
Gaano nga ba katagal? Hmmm.. Secret yon. Di ko ugali magsabi ng ganyan about sa past ko. I dunno. Siguro respect na rin for my exes. Ha ha.

6. How long did you date before you decided to settle down?
No settling down yet. Not at this time.

7. How long did you know he was the ONE?
Wala pa nga eh. Meron ba?

8. Now, at what age will you allow your kid(s) to date? (if and only if I end up having kids)
I wanted twin boys. Hmmm.. So with boys, hindi masyadong strict. All they have to do is give me good grades. Graduate school. Get a good job. Then the rest is up to them.

9. When it comes to your kids dating, will you be a cool parent or a strict parent?
Cool. Ayoko ng strict. Reminds me of my father. Baka maging rebellious anak ko.

10. What piece of advice can you give to your child when they start dating?
Uhm... Don't hurry up...

Di ko feel mag-tag. Ha ha ha..

August 23, 2008

Gusto ko ng mag-tag... E, ikaw.. ikaw nga!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Kama

Ilang minuto na lang at hatinggabi na. Napilit akong bumaba dala ng gutom na hindi ko napawi nung oras ng hapunan. Ako ay nasa Trinoma nung mga oras na iyon. Habang minumuni-muni ko ang pocherong inihanda ng aking ina, napansin ko ang pulang ilaw sa telebisyon. Kinuha ko ang remote. Sabay pindot sa power at bumukas ang telebisyon.

Matagal na rin akong hindi nakakapanood ng telebisyon nang tuloy-tuloy. At minsan kapag ako ay napapadaan sa harap ng telebisyon, ang pinapalabas Eat Bulaga o kung ano mang palabas matapos ang Eat Bulaga. Magagawa kong tumambay sa harap ng telebisyon, maglipat at magtingin sa ibang istasyon, ngunit makaraan ang ilang minuto, bibitawan ko na ng remote at aakyat sa kwarto ko ang lulunrin ang sarili sa mundo ng internet.

Ngunit kanina, hindi ito nangyari. Umupo ako ng matagal, dala ang hapunan at inabangan ang susunod na programa...

I-witness. Wow. Interesante. Sige tuloy lang ang panonood... Uy, si Kara David ang gumawa ng dokumentaryong ito. Sobrang interesante. Tuloy lang.

Pier 16. Yun ang pamagat ng dokumentaryo nya. Inilahad nya ang kwento ng tatlong pamilyang naninirahan sa Pier 16. Walang bahay. Walang maayos na tirahan. Kundi sa ilalim at sa ibabaw lang ni mga truck.

Nang inilahad ni Kara ang kwento ni Lenard at ang kanyang nanay, sobra akong kinilabutan. Hindi sa dahil natatakot ako, kundi dahil naaawa ako sa kanila. Tuwing gabi, magpapalipat-lipat sila ng truck na tutulugan, sapagkat halos lahat ng truck doon ay bumibiyahe. Dala-dala ang kanilang mga damit at ang karton na nagsisilbi nilang higaan, kapag aalis na ang truck, agad silang babangon at maghahanap ng bagong truck na matutulugan.

Pag oras ng kainan, hindi sila kumakain sa plato. Sa plastik. Ang dahilan? Para kung sakali na may dumating na mga manghuhuli, kaagad silang makakaalis at makakapagtago. Si Lenard, na 6 na taon pa lang, ay maswerteng pinapag-aral ng kanyang magulang (yun kasing apat na anak nung ikatlong pamilya na kasama sa dokyu, ni isa, hindi nag-aaral). Kamakailan nga lang nalaman ng guro niya na sa Pier 16 sila nakatira.

Nung kausapin ni Kara si Lenard, lalo akong naawa sa estado nung bata. Nung tanungin sya ni Kara, "anong gusto mo paglaki mo?" Ang sagot niya "Barko." Nang muling tinanong ni Kara "anong gusto mong trabaho paglaki mo?" "Bahay," ang naisagot nung bata. Gusto pala nyang mag-ayos ng bahay. Gusto nung bata na sa bahay sya. Gusto nya ng bahay. Nabanggit pa nya na gusto nya ng kama. Malaking kama. Tunay na nakahahabag.

Galing pala sial sa probinsya. At tulad ng ibang galing sa kani-kanilang probinsya, umasa sila na magiging maayos ang buhay nila dito sa Maynila. Bagamat marami kanila ang ganoon pa rin ang pag-iisip, ang nanay ni Lenard, hindi. Napag-tunton nya na wala kang paroroonan dito sa Maynila hanggat wala kang trabaho. Nabanggit nyang gusto nilang bumalik sa probinsya. Dahil doon may bahay sila. May matitirhan. May mahihigaan. Nag-iipon lamang sila ng pamasahe para sila ay makabalik sa tunay nilang tahanan. Kung saan walang manghuhuli. At hindi kelangang magpalipat-lipat.

Bago matapos ang dokyu ni Kara David, muling pinakita ang mag-ina. Si Lenard, na kahit na ganoon ang kanilang buhay, ay nagagawa pa ring tumawa at magsaya... at higit sa lahat magpasalamat sa taas...

Reality Check lang po.

Monday, August 18, 2008

See You In London

Natuwa ako dun sa logo ng 2012 Olympics. Controversial kasi to eh.

Saka try looking at it with a green mind.

Ha ha ha.

The after 6 habit...

If you have this habit of not taking dinner or not eating anything after 6 pm, for the sake of getting thinner or you are perhaps on a strict diet to get rid of your flabs, would you ask someone to go on a "dinner" date?

I met a guy, of course on G4M, we talked... exchanged numbers and finally decided to go out. He invited me on a dinner/movie date and so I agreed. Call time - 7 pm. Place - a place where you can watch and dine.

He works in a callcenter. So usually, he comes home at 8 or 9 in the morning that's why he decided to a dinner/movie date. Sabi nya gisingin ko daw sya ng ika-5 ng hapon, para hindi sya mahuli sa usapan at maabutan namin ang napag-usapan namin pelikula (straight Tagalog!). But I was never able to wake him up since I was dead asleep too. But I was able to send him a message arounf 5:30 pm. But he still woke up late.

So despite the time, he decided that we can just have dinner and bypass the movie. He has work by 11 pm by the way, so he can't stay long. Ok. Good.

Then goes the preparations. The travel. The heavy rain. The "where are you" messages. Then the "I'm here at... I'm wearing..." And finally the meet up.

Nang magkita kami, sabi ko na gusto kong kumain ng pasta. Ok, sige sabi nya. E di naglakad kami papuntang ikatlong palapag at pumunta ng Italianni's. Inihanap ng upuan ng waitress at ayun. Menus were handed over. I was looking at the pasta section of the menu when he stopped looking at the menu and placed it on the side of the table.

"Ikaw na lang umorder para sakin..."

"Bakit?"

"E kasi gusto ko yung light lang or burger, hindi na kasi ako kumakain after 6 pm..."

"Ah ok..."

It took me awhile to choose. Sabi ko sa sarili ko, "ah, bahala ka."

We ordered lasagna. Coke for me. Iced tea for him.

The conversation went well. Some little silent moments. But what I was concerned about is, he didn't even touch the food. Di nga nangalahati ung iced tea. Oh, well sige, wag mong kainin, kakain ako. Nagugutom ako eh. At the back of my mind it came to me, "hindi ka pala kakain, bakit nag-aya kang magdinner... or perhaps, you could've told me earlier you aren't eating after 6 pm para we could've done another thing rather than having dinner..."

Syempre ayoko naman maging bitchy sa harap nya. And hello, magmumukha naman akong tanga kung ganun. So sige, kain lang. Konti kwento. It was minutes past 10 when I got the bill. He was about to pay, sabi ko "ako na..."

(Kapal naman ng mukha ko. Ako na nga yung kumain ikaw pa magbabayad? Duh!)

Ang for the other lasagna that wasn't eaten, pinabalot ko!

Hinatid ko sya sa labas. When I was walking after he left, it never went off my mind na "bakit mo ako ininvite ng "dinner" date kung hindi ka pala kakain? Buti na lang I had friends waiting in Coffee Bean. We drank the night away....

Friday, August 15, 2008

Sexy Ladies

I can't help but post this. This is one of the best videos and fightscenes I have ever seen. I can't stop marvelling at it. This is so great I can't stop watching it over and over. I even decided to put it in my ipod.



Kudos to the people who made this!

I can't wait for what happens next.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Plain

Have you ever been to a point in your life that you have a lot of things in mind, a lot of plans, a lot of hobbies to spare and like you can busy yourself with all the things you can and wanted to do, but come that time when you wanted to do it, you just can't. Probably because your just not up to it yet, you just don't feel like doing it or your just plain lazy to do it.

Yeah?

Me? Yes.

So many times. Including now...

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Blow-out

Laptop Blogs Revisited

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

3:32 AM


Get a life!! I know how you work!! I'm not gonna lose it ONE MORE TIME. You got me ONCE, you'll never get me again!!!


********

Hayz, I'm just inches away from another blow-out! Not the happy blow-out everybody is thinking about, but it’s the negative interpretation.


As you know, your father has read your journal and has found out that "you know" skeleton-in-the-closet thingie. And all my reasons didn’t work out. And with all due respect, I promised my dad that I'll never be what he is thinking with which I never fulfilled. He actually asked my to burn that journal, but "hell no!"


Now, he is here again. He so suspicious. When he came home from Laoag one day and I was sleeping, he woke me up just to say I'm here and he looked at my room, scrutinizing the papers here and the things there. Though I'm still sleepy as oil during those times, I still managed to look after him as he did his scrutinizing. And fortunately, he found nothing.


Then this incident happened. Today, or I mean, earlier today, I went down to watch TV and as usual, for "safety" purposes, whenever I leave my laptop, I would normally log it off and close it. I did log it off but did not close the laptop. I didn’t because I thought they were asleep. As I watched the cute Jumong do his act, I heard the sound of the screensaver (Like a burning something) and it was loud. Loud that I could hear it and loud that my dad woke up just to stare at the computer.


Hearing someone come out of the room. I immediately jumped out of my seat and went up just to realize that he was staring at the laptop trying to figure out what the sound was and what's on the screen.


I never thought that the screensaver shown was (****)'s pic ******** (super hot and super sexy - super yummy!!)


I think my father was having a hard time figuring out what the image was, partly because of the flame thingie that covers the image and changes the color, the dark colored feature of the pic, plus the angle from where he is looking at. He is looking from the top of the laptop - laptops have different colors when viewed from different sites.


With that in hand, I immediately looked at the monitor, shocked at the picture I saw (oooh sexy!) and immediately closed the laptop. And as usual my fathers scrutiny rose again. He was asking if I had a secret in there that I didn’t want him to know. I didn’t answer the question and asked if the sound creating a noise. He just said yes, went back to the room as I checked on my laptop.


I went down with my laptop and realized what I didn’t do. And reasoned out to myself that I have rights to privacy. I have the rights to have secrets from my father. I'm old enough to do so.

Friday, August 8, 2008

Up In The Clouds

Been out of the blog scene for around three days now. I'm at work, trying to do my stuff, yet my throat aches, I am coughing and I am super-sleepy... And to keep myself up and running for the 8-hour period, I managed to be creative enough to keep myself busy... and that includes...

* looking at my new crush sa office. damn he's hot.
* fliritng with another guy sa text
* mag-chat ng mag-chat
* magsurf ng mga blocked sites using a proxy, magbasa ng chismis sa pep.ph and perezhilton.com
* at mangulit ng mga taong nagttroubleshoot ng computers

I was on Baguio last weekend. A friend of mine came home from Dubai and as a treat to me and our former officemates, he or I mean she, or what I mean is "he", ok, he's a she, paid for our fare and accomodation. Three days.. Two nights.. Even though JuLiaN, will be making "my" way through Luzon, we decided to continue with the trip. Its more like once in a lifetime...

Sabi nga nila, pag-pinag-usapan ang lakad hindi natutuloy. By experience, I believe in that saying. Pero, this time, even though napag-usapan, natuloy pa rin. Aba kahit ako ay parating sa Luzon, walang pakialam. Go pa rin.

We had an awesome time. And it would be boring if I'd be telling you the itinerary (yung kasama namin mahilig gumawa ng itinerary pag may ganito) that we strictly followed and the places we've been to. I know you've been there too. Hindi pa? Tara, Baguio, now!

Ha ha ha. What's cool about this is that the group that I went out with, my former officemates, know who I really am. I opened it up I think more than a year ago, and eto lang yung time na muli kaming lumabas after nung nag-open ako sa kanila.

It was a Saturday night, I suppose. Can't remember the date. But it was more than a year ago. Far earlier than the incident that I puked in Bed. We met... and went to Fluid. Straight mode pa ang Fluid non. And so we entered. Had drinks. Tapos dun kami sa taas.

I told them na may important announcement ako. We formed a circle and then..

"Alam ko alam na ni Y to. (He's the gay guy na nagtreat samin sa Baguio)"

Then I let him speak. At first hindi nagets nung isa naming kasama. Eh may pagka-engot yun. Tapos binulungan sya nung isang kasama namin.

And they all understood my announcement. No negative reactions. All was happy. Happy for me. Proud of me. And so did that party continued.

Later that night dumating yung isa pang officemate namin na guy sa Fluid, that time we decided to leave the bar na. While we were walking papunta sa haus nya para ituloy yung inuman, yung kasama naming mataba opened it to him. And he never reacted negatively. Ok lang sa kanya. Tanggap nya.

While we were on the way to Baguio, I remembered these scenes. Natutuwa ako. Masaya. Sarap ng feeling na you don't have to worry about your skeletons in the closet or I mean your luggage. Ha ha. Ang gaan sa loob.

Pag may dumadaan nga na cute guy, sinasabihan ko c Y at yung mataba naming friend eh..

"Alam mo bet ko sya!"

"Nakita mo yung naka-blue? bet ko yun?"

Saya ng feeling.

I enjoyed Baguio more.

I'm still discreet. And only a few people know, other than the Gay Community, of course. And as of now, I intend to keep it that way. Tama na muna yung konti lang nakakaalam.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Survivor!

I am currently making a new post... pero dahil August 5 ngayon, eto muna..


HAPPY MONTHSARY BLOG!



Never thought this would survive!


Ayun lang!


Thanks to all!